Prompt: Quote: "I think of you. I just can't talk to you right now." and the song: "I'll Be Waiting" by Adele as part of the weekend challenge for March 6-8, 2015
Word Count: 1270 words
Disclaimer: I in no way own any part of Arrow
Warnings/Spoilers: never happened
Summary: Felicity did what she did and hoped they can get past it.
Author's Note: When I saw the prompts for this weekend, I immediately thought about the two most recent, awful things that happened on Arrow and knew it would fit perfectly. That moment when she said what she said and then that other moment when she did what she did. *sigh* It must be fixed. Has to be fixed. This is my fix. Sort of. And again, no beta other than me, hemingway app, and grammarly (sort of).
Quote: "I think of you. I just can't talk to you right now."
It took her a moment to figure out where she was once she woke up in his bed. She felt a twinge in her heart or gut or maybe both when she realized she woke in the wrong bed. What did she do? What was she thinking? "Oh my god." Felicity sat up and sighed. She felt cold and quickly grabbed the blanket to cover herself. "Oh my god."
She looked around and realized Ray wasn't even there. "Great. We have sex, I fall asleep and he leaves. Not saying too much about me right now, is it?" Felicity searched for her clothes and got dressed as soon as she found them. She wandered through his place and heard a noise. As she turned, she saw him. "No, you did not."
He never said a word until he removed the suit. "I did. And it worked." He paused a moment and realized that Felicity was out of the bed and dressed like she intended to leave. "Hey, you're dressed."
"Hey, you've got eyes." She walked toward him but stopped. "You left. We, well, we did what we did and then I woke up with you gone. Not very good for my ego, to say the least."
Ray closed the distance between them but before he could wrap his arms around Felicity, she backed away from him. "You changed your mind."
Felicity didn't know how to answer him. "I don't know." She tried to turn but, of course, did so too quickly and ended up stumbling her way to the door. "I, I should go. I need to check on some things." She put her hand on the doorknob and made certain not to turn back and look at him. "I'll talk to you later," she said as she opened the door and left.
Felicity stayed on her couch for three days. She ignored her phone. She ignored the knocks on her door because she knew it was Dig. Or Roy. Or even Ray. She had no idea how she could possibly face anyone. They would ask questions and Felicity had no answers because she didn't understand any of it.
He knocked on her door. He waited and knocked again when she didn't answer. Oliver kept knocking and decided he would knock until she opened the door. Everyone was worried and he was not going to let her hide anymore. He didn't care what happened. He needed to know she was okay. "Felicity? Look, I know you're in there. I hear the tv." He smiled. "I know you just muted the tv so you can't hide. Please?"
She leaned her head on the back of the couch. He said please and she was in no shape to ignore him as he stood outside her door. "Fine." She opened the door but stood in his way so he couldn't come inside. "What?"
"Are you okay?"
"That's it?” Oliver hoped for some sort of explanation, even if it was a lie.
"I'm not explaining anything to you. You wanted to know if I am okay and you should be able to see that I'm just fine." She put her hands on her hips.
"No, you're not fine. I can see you're not fine." Oliver wanted to help her, but he knew he couldn't. Or he knew he shouldn't until she decides she wants his help. He missed her and he hated that he missed her.
"I don't need anything."
He took a deep breath. "So, you've just shut yourself off completely to me? The only way you want me anywhere near you or in your life is if it has to do with work? And even then it seems you only want the bare minimum." He turned away from her so he could figure out what he could say to make this better for them. "Do you want me to find someone else to do what you do?" He couldn't face her as he asked the question.
Oliver turned back toward Felicity. "Are you sure?"
"What can I do, Felicity?"
"Nothing. There's nothing you can do right now."
"I guess I just have to leave you alone and eventually you'll decide to think about me as someone other than the Arrow? Or the man you wish didn't love you?”
She fought back tears. "I think of you. I just can't talk to you right now. Not now."
"But sometime? Sometime you'll talk to me?"
"I promise." She tried to give him a reassuring smile but knew it was a pathetic excuse for a smile. "I'll see you tomorrow?"
"So you'll be back tomorrow?"
"I'll see you then, Felicity."
“I'll Be Waiting”
"I'm not as smart as you might think."
Oliver turned toward the voice and smiled. "How do you know I think you're smart?"
He walked over to Felicity and stood in front of her. "What happened?"
"We don't need to go into details, right?"
"Let's see. You completely avoided me and everyone else for three days. You come back here like you weren't gone and never said a word about what might have happened. You continued to avoid eye contact with me for another week and a half. And today, you walk in here and tell me you aren't as smart as I might think. Or as smart as you think I think you are."
"Well, now you're talking like I do." She smiled.
"Don't make me tell you everything." She sighed. "Please don't make me tell you everything."
"I should have fought harder. I stood there and didn't stop you. Whatever happened, it's okay."
"No. I mean, yes, it's fine because we're adults and we weren't together, but after it happened it made me realize that I am not as smart as I thought I was. As you thought I was." Felicity hated the fact that she still stumbled over her words around Oliver. “I should have stayed here. I left and then...”
"If I had to guess, I know what happened. I might not be able to guess what it made you realize." When she closed herself off to everyone, Oliver guessed that something happened between her and Ray. He assumed it was inevitable once he realized they were working together. He can't blame her because it was his own fault for not fighting harder for her and for pushing her away.
"I didn't mean it." Felicity waited a beat before she added, "what I said. About not wanting to be a woman you loved. Well, maybe I meant it because of the way things always end badly, but I kind of like the fact that there's two things you know or knew, and one of them was loving me."
He took three steps toward her to close the distance, placed his hands on her cheeks and he kissed her. Really kissed her. The way he should have kissed her every single day they were even near one another so she wouldn't have wished for a second that she wasn't a woman he loved. He ended the kiss and looked at her as he took a step back. “I do know that I love you. I don't know how I can make this work, but I know I want to try.”
Felicity smiled. “Are you sure? I didn't ruin everything, did I?"
"Nothing is ruined."
"Yeah, good. Now, can we get to work?" Diggle, Roy, Laurel, and Thea were standing by the stairs, waiting.
Oliver chuckled. "Yes. We can get to work now that everything is headed in the right direction."